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DEAR ABBY: I’m a widow and miss my husband very a lot. We frequently had dinner collectively.
I’ve associates I’ve dinner with, however generally I’m going out alone. Each time I say I am eating alone, the host or hostess asks, It is like an insult. I want a reminder that I’m alone with no husband.
I lately informed this to a good friend who informed me he feels the identical method when he dines alone. He additionally considers it offensive. Please share this with readers who work within the hospitality trade.
ARE YOU IN COLORADO?
DEAR ONLY YOU. I’m printing your letter, however I feel you might be responding to a query which may be extra about process than social commentary. Your host or server might ask that query as a result of they need to know if extra place settings ought to be faraway from the desk.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a single man with a detailed girlfriend who can be single. We dwell about half an hour aside, so most of our communication over the past 25 years has been over the cellphone. We talked virtually on daily basis.
Two years in the past I observed he stopped calling me till he was going to get collectively.
Then I observed that after I referred to as him, he would depart it on voicemail and never return my name for days.
A few yr in the past he stopped returning my voicemails altogether. I attempted to drastically cut back my calls however no cube. I additionally tried switching to texts however he would not reply to them both.
You would possibly assume she’s associates with me, however she’s not. We nonetheless get collectively typically for dinner or a film, normally at his suggestion by way of electronic mail. However not returning, and even answering, my calls or texts positive feels mistaken.
I’ve tried to ask him about it, however he cuts me off saying he “did not decide up the cellphone”. Or he is “dangerous at checking voicemails and texts.” His newest excuse is that he is “simply not good on the cellphone.”
Abby, I do know cellphone etiquette has modified and younger folks not often use the cellphone nowadays. However we’re in our 60s and for 25 years our relationship was principally over the cellphone. It is one factor you need to lower it again, and even cease calling me. However ignoring my (now rare) calls or texts feels insulting.
Is that this regular and will I nonetheless think about an individual like this one in every of my closest associates?
GHOSTED IN THE WEST
DEAR GHOST: A sudden sample change will not be regular. One thing has modified.
Since you may’t get him to clarify what prompted this alteration in his conduct, think about taking a web page out of his playbook. Talk with him by electronic mail solely in response to his emails to you, and discover another associates who will deal with you politely.
DEAR READERS: As I replicate on this previous yr, I additionally need to want you a contented, wholesome 2023. Did it fly by as shortly for you because it did for me?
I am going to be a part of you tonight to “toast” a brand new yr that I hope will probably be a much less aggravating one for all of us. If you happen to’re celebrating tonight, please take measures to guard not solely your well being, however the security of others. Completely happy New Yr, everybody!
LOVE, ABBY
Pricey Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, often known as Jeanne Phillips, and based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Pricey Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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